Dolphin Skull Story Time

Remember Story Time in kindergarten, when all the children gathered around to hear the teacher read a story? Is that what it's like to write for a living?

No, it's much harder and snarlier. But.

Now and again you find something that seems enormously enticing from a writer's point of view, such as a headline like this one:

Dolphin Skull found in Baggage at Detroit Airport

No one claimed the baggage, either.

Shall we? Yes, I mean -- Why not?

After a harsh Michigan winter in Birmingham, a suburb of Detroit, Mr. and Mrs. Incessant go on a long-planned vacation with their twin sons Jake and Jaspar , who will be ten years old on April 15. Jake is a swimmer and Jaspar loves theater, but both are excited to be in the Caymans, where divers and divers' stories are widely celebrated.

Jake being more versed in water sports was the first person in the family to discover the dolphin, or what was left of the dolphin. Jaspar was a bit jealous at the fuss his parents made over it, but had no way of rebelling except to be silent, mostly, when Jaspar was being praised up and down the beach for his find.

It was decided the dolphin head needed it's own suitcase on the way home, being an oddly-shaped object that wouldn't quite fit into any other luggage the family brought along. Mr. and Mrs. B let Jaspar choose the suitcase in a muddle-headed bid to keep him involved without feeling jealous. Jaspar asked if he could be in charge of the dolphin skull and when Jake objected, the boys' mom reminded Jake of how important it was to participate in family activities together--as a family.

You know where I'm going, don't you? Boy finds dolphin skull. Boy's brother loses dolphin skull (accidentally on purpose, but no one can prove it). Finder boy is furious and calls up local paper with his story. Paper has received hundreds of stories like this and doesn't know what to do except publish another story about it.

Skull never does find its way back to Jake, though his mother again points out (unhelpfully) that the animal got the worst of it. Father agrees, saying life is hard, boys, and we have to learn to roll with the punches because dolphins will come and go.

Then, oops -- I just remembered I wanted this to be a horror story, with the dolphin skull possessed by supernatural juju that attacks Jaspar, just when everyone else seems to have forgotten about their vacation and the boys are all grown up. 

J and J have switched places somehow, so Jaspar (out of guilt at losing the dolphin skull on purpose) becomes a diving instructor and his brother Jake (out of excess emotional baggage) becomes a ridiculously successful actor who buys a trillion dollar home in the Caymans while Jaspar (still jealous of his brother?) --entices Jake's girlfriend to go sailing with him and they get lost at sea and-- 

Stop.

Rule one of Story Time is never to bore thyself, and if you do, it's a sure sign you need to start OVER. Or start a new idea, especially if you prefer stories about people doing terrible things despite themselves and having arguments with God and the Devil.

I'll try to come up with something like that in the future. I will also try to tell a story like Meryl Streep did in Out of Africa when she was playing Isak Dinesen, even though the screenplay only shows the beginning and end of the story because the writers couldn't think of anything.

In the meantime, if you live in a state like Michigan, I hope you can leave for a while this winter.

I'm going to do my best, though I promise not to bring home a dolphin skull. Even if you find me one.

Photo by Bertrand Borie on Unsplash