Tween Talk: That Whole Fashion-Glamour Thing

Holiday time means party and family time--which in my world, also means party clothes and makeup. I have a male friend who says he loves dressing up, wearing women's stockings, eyeliner and mascara.

I asked him, would you love it that much if it was a requirement?

Don't know, he said, but I love it now.

I do like the way heels look, but I hate wearing them. I was never really a makeup person, either, though growing up, I pored over the magazines trying to figure out how to look like the models and wondering why I never could.

I wish I realized then that I had my own style and whatever it is they call "glamour" isn't something you can buy in a magazine. It would have saved me a lot of time crowding around a mirror with the other women and girls in my extended family. Time I could have used.

So, glamour. What is it?

Magazines like Elle, Vogue, GQ, InStyle and yes, Glamour want you to think they know. But is that what we see when we open their pages?

Well, no. 

Not that I have anything against these magazines, but... 

No.

I have never seen anything in their pages that convinces me "I must go out and buy that outfit NOW!" Not even once.

So what IS this whole glamour thing? If you want to talk about with your tweens, what do you say?

I DON'T think it's about some fashion guru's sense of fashion. I DO think you can dress yourself and look exceptional IF you have confidence. Things like weight, body type, hair color, and even what you are wearing matter a whole lot less than you (and your teens and tweens) think.

In writing about a girl growing up in the Beat Generation, I don't touch on fashion very much, but Beat fashion, such as it was, can be summed up pretty simply: leotards, leggings, jeans, and lots of black (did they really wear berets)?  It was mostly form, not fashion, and I think it was really supposed to be about not caring about what they wore.

In The Beat on Ruby's Street, Ruby's mother Nell says "Pretty fades, but cool is forever."  I think that's what Beats believed, and I stand behind that. 

Because glamour isn't about money or conventional beauty or having a new power outfit every five minutes. It's about how you carry yourself. 

You can't buy that. You have to live it. And the reason people look so good in movies is because they figured out how to stand up well, physically and emotionally and be who they are, fully and without apology.

That doesn't fade, and can only get better with time, yes? 

If only we could sell it. Like a magazine.

Hands & toes photo: Katie Tegtmeyer


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